Iowa City, here I come

Good times

2007-12-07T15:43:00.001-06:00

I wish I had something new and exciting to write about, but I don't. We've been through a week of freezing rain and the consequential accumulating-ice-on-everything (I had to scrape my car three times in one day), which now turned into snow. But I can't even report that - it will be like tapping into replays of last winter's posts. Is it time to change the concept of my blog, or even shut it down altogether? Do I want to have a blog now that I'm just a person in Iowa City, and no longer the great New Yorker who moved to the Midwest?
It's been a year since I moved (actually, a year minus two weeks. Okay). I've been though the full seasons' cycle and the academic year cycle, with a big move to a new place and to a new relationship. My main frustration is still my struggle with academic writing and getting published, just as it was a year ago. And I'm about to stamp an H-1B in my passport for the very last time.

I'm looking forward to the next few weeks. I'm excited about spending time with both families, and can't wait for Ryan to meet everybody in my family, especially Roni - the only member of my immediate family who he hasn't met. Then, while in Naperville, we'll probably get together with our friends Ira, Brian and Jessica, who I can't wait to see again, and hopefully with Anna too, who I haven't seen since September. Then we're going to Israel and I'll get to spend time with my Israeli friends - I especially miss Arava and Shay, maybe because I saw both fairly recently. And Israel is so much fun.

So where am I going from here? Is it time to unblog myself? I'm not sure. Ideas and suggestions are welcomed.

Sociobiology II

2007-12-01T17:31:00.000-06:00

An incident from Thursday night got me thinking about the role of female socialization in our perceptions of power.
Here's what happened: We were out with a couple of friends, and one guy kept making comments toward Jen and I and trying to engage in some kind of flirting with us, though we were there with Ryan and another male friend. About an hour into the evening, after he approached me and commented about my "sexy accent", Ryan told him to back off. The guy went to his friends and starting talking loudly about Ryan's comment, and we left shortly after, realizing that if we stayed it will end up in a physical fight.

I always found it difficult to understand why guys engage in physical violence, but after talking with Ryan some more, I think I have a better idea. I explained to Ryan the way most women handle these situations: If a guy in a bar is seeking our company but not to a dangerous or offensive degree, and if we realize that we are going to be in each other's proximity for a while (as in - in the same bar), we will blow him off gently with niceties. It will take a lot for me to say to someone "please leave me alone, I'm not interested"; I'm more likely to sweetly say something like "would you excuse my friend and I, we are in the middle of something". If someone is completely out of line, I will say "please leave me alone", and if that doesn't work, I will leave the place. (Emily and I had to do it once - remind me to tell you the story about that guy when I see you, dear reader.)

The point being, even if someone is completely out of line, I will never consider engaging in physical violence. Is it because I know that I am obviously going to lose the fight, being smaller and weaker than the average guy? Would I have been more drawn to doing that - or thinking about it - if it weren't for my size? Would all women? There are teenage cultures in which girls engage in physical fights with each other no less than the boys. Are we all the same in our aggressive tendencies, but being a woman, I have learned long ago that those tendencies are useless and will get me nowhere, and I'm better off mastering the more nuanced social verbal skills to get rid of an eager guy in a bar? Ryan said he could have killed that guy. Is that a tendency I could have felt had I been socialized as someone with physical strength?

Badware

2007-11-29T11:10:00.000-06:00

I know that everybody hates computer viruses and warms, but you have to understand how so very upsetting these things are for someone like me. Not because I get them - I'm much too careful, like most of us - but because I've always had a hard time comprehending senseless evil. I can understand theft: you take something from someone and end up having something you didn't have before. But computer viruses don't even benefit the wrongdoer. Isn't that the definition of evil? (no, but it's almost the definition of pernicious.) I really can't understand causing harm for the sense of harm alone. I think that it's a part of my general bizarre morals - I can be very forgiving of certain things if they make sense, but a less harmful action that I perceive as senseless can infuriate me to no end - and computer viruses have always been an example.

So I just read this and this. These malware websites can get even the most email-circumspect person, and that drives me crazy. Something that activates itself without the user doing anything - that's just wrong. Basically, never click on funky-looking .cn links that come up in google searches.

I also got a perfect score at pool on Tuesday, which doesn't happen often. The league raffles a $10 bar tab every week between those who scored a perfect score on the previous week, so this may translate into beer, yay.

Oh, and I've decided to let me hair grow. Ha.

Post-turkey

2007-11-26T15:13:00.001-06:00

I didn't actually have turkey, but there was a big family meal, and we did spend the holiday at Ryan's parents' house. I had a great time.
Not much else to tell. The first snow of the season began (and ended) on the day of our departure, and I was excited, as I always am. And the final move-out took place yesterday, as we took out everything that was left in my old apartment. This entire move was pretty odd: it took place using only my and Ryan's cars, nothing was packed at any point, and it included about 10 or 15 rides between my old place and my new place. By now we have integrated almost everything into the house, sold what had to be sold, and stored what had to be stored. It's finally done.

Lastly, here is an brief description of the "Joan or John" case, for those of you who aren't familiar with it. I became familiar with it through a documentary I saw on TV (PBS?) about a year ago. By now the person's identity is no longer hidden, and he was interviewed for the movie along with his parents, ex-wife (they have divorced by now) and therapist. I found the article while looking for a different NYT article for a class meeting I'm teaching about gender, and found the description to be chilling and effective - just in case anyone out there has ever doubted the wisdom of sociobiology.

I'm in the paper!

2007-11-19T17:09:00.000-06:00

Here is the main story, and here is the box with my bit. This is all she kept from an interview that was about an hour long!

Ladybug count: 8

2007-11-16T14:15:00.000-06:00

There's a ladybug in my office. Right now.

Update - Tuesday morning:

It's still here. And it's dead.
I think it came to my office for company - here's a sample of the collection I have in my office:

Well, plus one dead one on my couch.

Dentist I

2007-11-15T17:06:00.000-06:00

I went to the dentist today, as a part of my quest to use all of my flexcredits before 1/1. What it means is that I have a lot of money to spend on health-related things, and only a month and a half to spend it. You may ask - why didn't I use it until now? Well, that's because when it comes to my health insurance, I suddenly turn into a mentally challenged ape. It takes me 11 months to realize that flexcredits don't roll over.
So I went to the dentist's, and scheduled myself $300 worth of treatments for the upcoming month. But the real reason I'm bringing this up is my discovery that the spitting sink is gone. My new dentist had a hard time believing that my old NYC dentist (aka the best dentist in the world who I miss dearly) still used one. Did any of you know this? I miss the spitting sink. I loved the spitting sink.
Bring back the spitting sink.

Random things

2007-11-15T16:44:00.000-06:00

- Ryan is away for the weekend on unfortunate family circumstances, and I'm all alone. I plan on doing a lot of book-reading and movie-watching, though knowing myself, I'll end up doing a lot of bar-hopping and pool-shooting. I'm going to try and be good though - it's getting colder, and staying at home seems more and more attractive.

- Right before he left he made beef potroast, which I'll probably be eating for the next 3 days. We have become crock-pot junkies - it's just so much fun to get home from work and not have to think about dinner planning/cooking. And it makes the house smell fantastic.

- Ladybug count is still at 7. Oh, the disappointment.

More English language

2007-11-13T12:51:00.000-06:00

A new favorite: http://quotation-marks.blogspot.com
I'm so happy with this discovery, as unnecessary quotation marks are a pet peeve of mine.
Right behind it is this one.

I mean, literally, right behind it.

My brother and I

2007-11-12T11:45:00.001-06:00

Finally, here are the pictures Jen took when Ofer was here. The scariest one is the last one - it takes a second to figure out who's who.

Steak dinner

2007-11-11T13:43:00.000-06:00

My father was here for the weekend. It was his first time in Iowa, and we did our best to show him what it's like to spend a weekend in Iowa City, including watching the game at a local bar on Saturday morning, and throwing a backyard-fire-and-BBQ on Saturday evening. It went by so fast - we just dropped him off at the airport, and it's hard to believe he's already gone.

Ryan tending the fire:

The O'Connor split:

The lightsaber fight:

(I usually fix the redeye in all the photos I take, but my photo editor would not fix Seth's eyes in this photo. I think that it actually works here.)
More lightsaber pics, and many others, are here.

Comma

2007-11-08T13:09:00.001-06:00

I just learned that in the English language you use a comma before "and" - as in: Me, myself, and I. This adds to the list of grammar and punctuation rules that are completely oppositional between Hebrew and English. Wouldn't you think that languages will follow the same punctuation rules? Well, they don't.
Some of my favorites:
* using passive voice - preferable in Hebrew, frowned upon in English writing
* when a sentence ends with a quote, the full stop is inside the quote marks (this one is really weird)
* ironically, in English you generally use fewer commas - it took me a few years to stop using commas everywhere, and now I have to use them before the "and" at the end of a list. Behh!

I saw Saw

2007-11-07T22:44:00.000-06:00

and it wasn't scary at all! The other option is that I'm developing some horror-tolerance, since last week I saw Hellraiser and that one wasn't scary either. We'll see.
We have the two sequels - and now I'm looking forward to watching them.

Immigration, more

2007-11-05T11:41:00.001-06:00

I figured out why I hate immigration forms so badly.
I just filled out the forms for my US embassy appointment in January. The problem is that the embassy is using the same forms for people like me as they do for first-time tourists. The forms have to be filled out completely, and I find myself struggling with a form that is obviously a bad match for someone like myself. I guess that this is a part of my greater issue with being treated like a tourist every time I re-enter the United States, though I fully understand that the person sitting behind the desk in front of me at Immigration cannot tell from the looks of my passport whether I have lived here for 9 years or am I just arriving for the first time and cannot speak a word of English.

Examples - form DS-156:

26. How long do you intend to stay in the US?
- I live here
27. What is the purpose of your trip?
- I live here
28. Who will pay for your trip?
- Me
29. Have you ever been in the US? When? For how long?
- I have been living in the US since 1999
(this section has a sub-section in which I'm supposed to list every single past entry to the US. I have probably entered the country 20 or 30 times since 1999, so for years now I just leave it blank and let them deal with it)
30. Additional visa issuances:
- (here I have to list every single one of the 8 or 9 visas I was given in the past, with exact dates. I have discovered though that I can slack off at this section as well, and they seem to be fine with it)

I made an appointment online for 1/4, and discovered to my dismay that all visa appointments, every day, are scheduled for 8:10 AM. So much for short lines. I am so so so happy that this is the last time I'm doing this.

Chicago V

2007-11-04T16:51:00.001-06:00

By now I know that it's not really Chicago, but Naperville. We spent the weekend with Ryan's parents. Here they are:

Ryan's mother, Maria:

Us at a bison meat restaurant. This is a real bison head:

And again:

On the way back to Iowa, at an Illinois gas station:

The American embassy in Tel-Aviv

2007-11-01T13:12:00.000-06:00

They've finally gone completely insane:

http://israel.usembassy.gov/consular/acs/yourvisit.aspx

Your Visit to the U.S. Embassy in Tel Aviv

One of the most difficult aspects of visiting the U.S. Embassy in Tel Aviv to obtain American citizen or visa services has been standing in line outside in the heat or rain, before passing through security screening. In order to minimize the discomfort of our visitors, the Embassy has instituted new procedures that have greatly reduced the amount of time people must wait outside. Previously, visitors waited as much as two or three hours before entering the Embassy. Currently, the wait is usually no longer than fifteen or twenty minutes. The key to this success is that we now prohibit visitors from carrying ANYTHING other than paperwork, a credit card, and cash into the building. Not having metal objects, wallets, purses, bags, containers, luggage, backpacks, cell phones, watches, rings, coins, etc. means that visitors can move directly from outside through the security screening procedure almost without pause.
In order to make this new procedure work, visitors must either leave all of these objects at home or in their car, or find a place to store them near the Embassy. There is now a private commercial concern just north of the Embassy that will store these objects for a modest fee.
This new procedure is our way of responding to repeated and understandable complaints about extended waiting times outside the Embassy, especially during periods of hot or rainy weather. Thank you for your cooperation.

But the lines are longer inside, after the security checks, than outside! How about staffing more than 3 consular services windows when you schedule appointments for 300 people every day?
They better let me bring a book for the horrible nightmare which is the 2-hour line inside. I don't know who to be pissed at - Americans or Israelis - but I have a feeling it's the latter, since I've been to American embassies elsewhere and the Israeli version is by far the worst.

On a bright note, this is probably my last time of having to go through this process. Phew.

Ladybug count: 7

2007-11-01T12:44:00.002-06:00

I didn't write all week because nothing especially good or interesting happened. The move adds some unnecessary stress, but we're doing our best.

I saw two more ladybugs. That's it. Admittedly, a student of mine told me that she has a small ladybug problem in her apartment - she has 6 or 7 of them who crowd in one corner of the ceiling, as as she turns on the light, they scatter everywhere.

I've also learned that apparently, they're not ladybugs but indeed Asian Lady Beetles (as an anonymous commenter commented), and though they look a lot like ladybugs, I have noticed that they're bigger - some are almost as big as an M&M.

Which reminds me of this.

Game day

2007-10-27T20:42:00.000-05:00

My first football game! And we won! (which doesn't happen often)

It was all unplanned - as we were sitting around a bonfire at Russ's yard last night with friends, it turned out that a few of our friends have extra tickets for today's game. We made quick plans, and thus found ourselves woken up at 8 AM by Emily and Will, and by 10 we were tailgating with Scott and his people. The game started at 11 and ended at 3:30, after 2 overtimes and an Iowa victory! Yay!

My first game happened to be a very exciting and suspenseful game. I've been watching the Iowa games at home since I moved here, and this one was probably the most exciting one so far. Two overtimes! And we pulled through!

My football discoveries:

1. Toilets - in every other public event I've ever attended with more than 50,000 people, there are always LONG lines for the women's and non-existing lines for the men's. In football, apparently, it's the reverse. Finally, the tables have turned!
2. Tailgating - now I understand. All you had to do was tell me that there is no alcohol sold on premises, and that they don't allow anyone to bring any liquids into the stadium. My god. That makes absolutely no sense. And tailgating suddenly makes so much more sense.
3. Yellow - as the color of my elementary school's school uniform was yellow, I have been avoiding it as an adult - until now. Yes, I finally own a yellow t-shirt. Who knew.

The win:

Scott's victory dance:

The rest is here.

Ladybug count: 5

2007-10-24T10:42:00.000-05:00

It's fall already, and no ladybugs yet. I'm still waiting for hundreds of ladybugs to attack - or, as everybody here keeps correcting me, "Japanese beetles" - though from my online research it looks like Japanese beetles don't look anything like ladybugs. Hmm.
So I've started my own ladybug count. So far, the most I've seen in my day is 5 ladybugs in the kitchen of my old apartment yesterday - so I'm going to start from there.

More news: I sold my living room set on craigslist in half a day. I never realized how well craigslist worked in Iowa City. Craigslist is HUGE and very active in NYC, but much smaller in Iowa City, so naturally I had my doubts about its effectiveness - no more! Now that I know that I can sell my old things with ease, I'm more relaxed.

Tonight we're going to the Bob Dylan - Elvis Costello - Amos Lee show. Even Iowa City attracts some big names every once in a while!

New house

2007-10-23T12:34:00.000-05:00

My new house:
I know it looks huge, but Ryan's renting out the second floor and the basement, so we're not actually taking that much space by ourselves.
Oh, and - we saw the biggest, fattest opossum in the back yard, in full daylight. I'm so happy to have an opossum in my new place as well.

Girl fire

2007-10-22T13:20:00.001-05:00

Ryan spent Saturday night with a couple of buddies on a guys' night and left me all alone, so I put together a counter-bonfire in our back yard. We were originally 4 girls who started the fire (hence girl fire), which was more challenging - and satisfying - than I thought it would be. I never noticed that whenever we have a bonfire, there's always a guy who starts the fire and keeps it going. It's a lot of work. I will never take a bonfire for granted again.

Now all that's left is to BBQ by myself for the first time.

October

2007-10-18T13:57:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it's already October. Time flies. I feel like the semester has just begun, and suddenly it's already mid-term time. I've been here for 10 months, but it feels like I just moved yesterday.

We are in the process of talking about moving my furniture over to Ryan's, but haven't been able to decide what to do with it. We have a tentative plan of integrating some pieces while putting others in the basement, but there's a tenant in his basement right now, so we're not sure how to go about this. And since my place has not been re-rented yet, there's no hurry - only the relative discomfort with having my life divided between two places. I've canceled the cable and internet service at my old apartment and am slowly transferring small things, dreading the moment of having to deal with the big items (my books and my bookcase, what a headache). What I love most right now is that the coffee table that I got from Anna in May, when she moved out of town, has compartments in it (looks exactly like this), which will be oh-so-useful for my files, as Ryan's desk drawers (and cabinets, and shelves, and every other storage space in the house) are completely full.

Dean's garage

2007-10-15T14:03:00.001-05:00

These are the people I hang out with.

(Friday night, Dean's garage, right after drinks at the Sanctuary and right before the bonfire)

Better

2007-10-11T12:58:00.000-05:00

We've been sick for too long. Life is so different when you're sick. My breakthrough was yesterday - I spent an entire night without taking any cough medicine, for the first time in 10 days. Sounds like a minor accomplishment, but for me it was huge. Ryan is still off-kilter. We've been going to bed before midnight and abstaining from everything fun that you can do/drink/inhale, and I admit to missing all those fun things. My last frivolity - and the last time I felt good enough to socialize - was on Sunday, as Jen, Emily and myself finished a bottle of wine in my back yard. That was also the last time I had a cigarette. Can't wait to do it again - a few more nights without coughing, and I'll be back in full swing! Basically, I'm trying to get well by tomorrow, so I can hang out with Maria and Ira (ИPA) at the Sanctuary (look at their beer selection), and not having to drink coke all night.

Ryan's chipmunks

2007-10-09T12:31:00.000-05:00

It's hard to take photos of chipmunks - they move all the time and run away as soon as they detect you (unlike squirrels, who just stay there). These are some of Ryan's backyard chipmunks (for you, Ofer!):

And it's also my official new home.

Cough cough

2007-10-08T19:34:00.000-05:00

I've been coughing for a week, and finally went to the doctor today to find out that I have bronchitis. Oddly enough, other than the cough and losing my voice, most of the time I feel absolutely fine.

I'm dying to upload pictures of me cutting Dan's hair on Friday night, but I haven't gotten them yet from the people who were taking the pictures. We were standing outside in Marylin's back yard in the middle of Seth's surprise (but not really) birthday party, and I found out that I can cut other people's hair too - and do a good job at it! I'm so excited. This means that even if the academia evaporates overnight, I will still have a marketable skill to offer.

Pictures to come as soon as somebody puts them online.

Cell phone pics

2007-10-05T14:19:00.000-05:00

from yesterday at the Mill:

It started as Emily and I planned on meeting after work, and ended with 8 of us spending the better part of yesterday in the back yard of the Mill.

Best new word from yesterday: Exactually (© Maria)
Best new couple: ohh, you know who you are
Best waitress: Mandy

Saturday night II

2007-10-04T12:12:00.001-05:00

I completely forgot to mention Saturday night. Last weekend was Homecoming Weekend - I was in Chicago, so I didn't get to experience the event itself, but as I arrived back on Saturday evening, Ryan and I were hungry and felt like going out. He warned me about it being Saturday night, but up until now I wasn't aware of what it means in a college town, on the day of a home game, let alone on Homecoming weekend. It's like - well, it's like being in an American college movie. The downtown was covered with kids (this is how we refer to undergrads here), and everything that goes along with them - yelling, screaming, loud music and puke puddles. The male kids were in small groups of 2 or 3, wearing shorts, flip flops and some old t-shirt, while the female kids were in groups of 6 or 7, wearing extremely small dresses with extremely high stilettos. The sight is pretty amusing, especially due to the gender gap in appearance.
I'm impressed by how I've been able to completely avoid the kid scene until now. The bars and restaurants we go to are "grown-up places"and on Saturday nights we've been generally avoiding the downtown. You can live here and never even see the kids - just avoid certain bars and street corners. I'm also lucky with the location of my house - my street is one of those purely residential, quiet, shaded small streets, while still being very close to the downtown.
Actually, since I've been spending 90% of my time at Ryan's, I should start saying "my old street".

New favorites

2007-09-30T21:10:00.000-05:00

I'm in love with:
1. Cruise control. I can't believe I have never used it before. If you never have either, use it. Now.
2. Books on tape. I finished The Bell Jar and had a great time listening to it. What a great idea for a long drive alone.

Chicago was fun fun fun. I saw all the people I wanted to see and then some, watched a sold-out comedy show for free, and had the worst Belgian Waffle and the worst OJ ever. Though I brought my camera, I haven't used it even once, but here are some cellphone pics:

Cem, at the best dive bar in Chicago, with the only food he found at Walgreen's at 1 AM:

The drive back West:

Americans line up

2007-09-28T15:08:00.000-05:00

After 8 years in the states, Americans still surprise me. This one will leave my Israeli readers dumbfounded:
At one point, the main highway I was taking to Chicago narrowed into one lane due to some road work. The signs warning about the lane convergence appeared about 3 miles in advance of the merge. While I assumed that drivers will keep using two highway lanes until the very point of merge, everybody had lined up in a perfect one-lane traffic jam. For the next 3 miles, we all went slowly forward, bumper to bumper, in one perfectly orderly lane. No police cars, no policemen, no road workers; the left lane drivers just joined the right one as they saw the 3-mile sign. And for the next 3 miles (that's 5 kilometers, people), though the left lane was open and free, and though it took about 20 minutes to drive those 3 miles, no-one used it. I was stunned; I kept peering into the left lane in expectance of some sort of visible obstacle, but nothing.
In Israel, of course, drivers would have succeeded to somehow form 3 lanes by the merge point, and then crowd each other in a tight, nervous, aggressive bottleneck. I knew Americans are more patient and kind drivers, no doubt; but to me, this was the ultimate height of American voluntary orderliness.

I'm doing some reading in the hotel room while Shay is taking the Architectural Boat Tour, which I had already taken in a past visit. We hung out with my friend Cem last night and had some great steaks at Gibson's, and we have an outstanding date with him for tonight as well. Tomorrow I'll see my friends Keren and Ben who live in town, and will leave around 2 PM. I wish Eric and Alison were here already!

Chicago IV

2007-09-27T10:52:00.000-05:00

I'm off to Chicago, again. A good friend from Israel is going to be in town until Saturday afternoon, and together with one NYC friend who's in Chicago and one Chicago couple that I haven't seen in a while, it's a worth-while trip. We originally planned to split the airfare, but as it went up from $400 (which is already excessive) to $600, it became clear that if I want to visit, I'll have to drive. Well, I'm going to have him pay for that way-too-expensive midtown Chicago parking.
Emily and I went to the local bookstore yesterday after work, and I bought my first audiobooks ever. The logic is that my music alone will not be able to keep me happy and focused for 4 hours in each direction, but a book might. I've never done that before, and I'm mildly excited. I bought this book and this book, following Emily's recommendations.
I have a mountain of reading to do for next week, and both my classes next week are going to be observed for my annual faculty evaluation, but I'm looking forward to a Chicago adventure nonetheless. I plan on taking some time for reading while there. Wish I could have my academic readings for next week as audiobooks - that would have been perfect.

Ryan and I just celebrated four months. I'm going to miss you, Ryany!

Love letter

2007-09-21T11:18:00.001-05:00

I found a love letter. Come to think of it, in a college town, it's a little surprising that I haven't found one before. It was lying folded on the grass in front of the education building, and as Ryan and I were walking in this morning, I picked it up. A real love letter!

Do people even still write love letters? The girl who wrote the letter must be 18 or 19. I remember writing love letters when I was at that age. When did I stop? Does it mean that I don't love anymore, or that my letters have just taken the form of emails?

There's something adorably quaint about a true love letter. She's confessing her love for him for the first time (come on, of course I read it). Oh, to be the guy who receives a letter in which a girl is confessing her love for him!

The letter is signed with a first name. I looked it up at the university registry, and found only one student with that first name. I emailed her with a short note, asking whether she lost a love letter. Hopefully it's the right person, and I'll be able to give it back to her.

Half an hour later - Update: Oh the disappointment!

From: SRL
Sent: Friday, September 21, 2007 11:48 AM
To: Admon, Noga
Subject: RE: love letter

yeah, thanks i guess...you can just throw it away, i was just venting...

From: Admon, Noga
Sent: Fri 9/21/2007 10:15 AM
To: SRL
Subject: love letter

Did you by any chance lose a love letter on the lawn in front of Lindquist earlier today? I found it.

Life, resumed

2007-09-17T13:39:00.000-05:00

My mother and brother left yesterday, ending a total of two weeks of houseguests (one week Anna, one week mom and brother). They both liked Ryan and they both seemed to like Iowa City a lot, to which the multitude of social events must have been a contributing factor. On their last day in town we all attended Jim's famous annual Fish Fry: Jim fishes in Alaska all summer and comes back with enough salmon for an army, and then he invites all of his friends and neighbors to come over for a salmon-eating afternoon. There was a bonfire, there was live music, and the salmon was delicious - but an unexpected rain around 9 PM drove us all back into our cars. It was still a very unique event, and I'm glad my guests had a chance to attend such a "country" affair. The night ended with a few of us in Dean's garage in a nightly jam session.

Whenever I have visitors, their visit seems to end too soon. It's hard to believe that it's already been a week. It will be weird to go back to my usual life. Ryan and I are still trying to establish a "couple" routine that will include all the schoolwork we both have to do. It's not easy, since reading and writing are very solitary activities, and we'll have to learn how to sit in the same house and do our own readings. We seem to be doing well with it so far, so we're being optimistic, even though Ryan is taking 12 credits this semester and is teaching a class twice a week. As long as we're both equally busy, I think that it will work fine.

Saturday night

2007-09-09T01:38:00.000-05:00

The dialogue I just had with a friend:

Me: You should stop drinking
Drunk friend: Me too

Annas

2007-09-07T13:50:00.000-05:00

The last two pictures my camera took last night before dying:

1. My dear friend and houseguest Anna, in her last evening in Iowa City.

2. Another Anna - a different friend - as she attempts to maneuver around an oversized cicada on my deck. Everybody was jumping around it until Anna I (above) just walked over there and stepped on it.

The camera is on its way to the service center. The rest of the photos from last night are on Emily's camera, so I have no more to share. I have a day and a half of having no houseguests ahead of me, and then my mom and brother are arriving on Sunday. I should tell them to bring a camera!

Mower, quiet

2007-09-03T17:43:00.000-05:00

I almost forgot. I was highly impressed by Ryan's manual lawn-mower. It's quiet, requires no electricity or gas, and is a great physical exercise (I had some fun pushing it around the back yard, and it's not easy).

I love this mower.

Weekend in Naperville

2007-09-03T17:16:00.000-05:00

I spent the weekend with Ryan's family in Naperville, but not before Jen and I went to a mini rock festival at Tinley Park, right south of Chicago. One of my favorite bands (MSI) was playing, and I couldn't resist the relatiely short drive (when you live in Iowa, a 4-hour drive for a rock show isn't all that unusual). There were people my age around, and Jen and I agreed that I certainly wasn't the oldest person on premises, but the majority of attendees was roughly between the ages of 16 and 20.

My entire body still hurts from the very little jumping and head-banging that I subjected myself to. At least I got a lot of compliments on my plaid Docs.

Another activity that I am definitely too old for is fair rides. We spent Sunday at the Naperville "Last Fling", which is some kind of local city fair to celebrate the end of summer. Ryan and I stood in line for about 45 minutes for the one ride we decided to do (here's what it looks like), which was the scariest thing I've ever seen in my life. It was fun, in as much as being turned upside down and then up and down at 70 mph / 3 G's for several minutes can be fun. I'm still nauseous. (I really am.)

I got a houseguest - my friend Anna - who'll be staying with me until Friday, and then my mother and brother arrive on Sunday. These will be a busy couple of weeks.

First day of school

2007-08-28T10:19:00.000-05:00

I taught my first class of the new semester yesterday, and Ryan is teaching his first class today. It's funny, being a couple and working at the same place - I never had that experience before. We're very low-key when we're at the department, but there have been stolen elevator and hallway kisses, which are fun.

Yesterday was the first day of school for everybody. As Ryan and I were chatting by my office, we noticed a young girl, obviously at a loss, wondering around out of breath and looking at room numbers. When we asked her whether she needed help, she explained that she was looking for her class, and that the class had been already in progress for 20 minutes. She ran from a building at the other side of campus to our building, and couldn't find the right room. She was completely panicking, with tears running down her cheeks - clearly, a first-day freshman girl looking for her first college class. We sat her down in my office and looked at the online system for the correct room number, and then Ryan walked her right up to the door of the classroom, and helped her calm down a little before walking in.
We both felt sympathetic as we could both recall what it felt like, being a teenager, finding yourself lost within a large complicated system, and panicking for a few minutes. This is the kind of experience that adults rarely go through - as adults, we can put everything in perspective (being 20 minutes late to class is not the end of the world), we rarely panic, and we know what to do if we get lost or confused. I can't remember the last time I panicked (and I've been in some very unusual situations while backpacking...), and this girl brought back a childhood experience that I've almost forgotten.

My own first class went well (or at least I think it did) - I was glad to hear that the 4 students in my class who aren't from my program, were referred to the class by someone (either a faculty member or a fellow student) who recommended me as a teacher.
Yay!

Twenty-one

2007-08-26T08:42:00.000-05:00

1. Your favorite question in life:
Noga: Why?
Ryan: Do you like it?

2. I am listening to:
Noga: The Dandy Warholes
Ryan: Cocorosie

3. I talk about:
Noga: This with Ryan. He's for it, I'm against it.
Ryan: Communication. Books.

4. I love:
Noga: Traveling
Ryan: Reading

5. I have:
Noga: Tivo
Ryan: Poison Ivy

7. I lost:
Noga: Some of my old friends
Ryan: Everything, at one time or another

8. I hate it when:
Noga: Customer service people over the phone start talking real slow when they hear that I have an accent
Ryan: Lawn mowers wake me up

9. Love is:
Noga: The best feeling
Ryan: Real

10. Marriage:
Noga: I will do it again
Ryan: Sometimes necessary

13. Babies are:
Noga: Loud
Ryan: Beautiful. Necessary.

14. The last time I cried was:
Noga: A few weeks ago while listening to Beethoven's 7th. I always cry when I listen to it.
Ryan: A week ago, when I visited my grandfather

15. My cell phone is:
Noga: Always with me
Ryan: Retarded

16. When I wake up in the morning:
Noga: I jump right out of bed. Yes, I'm one of those people.
Ryan: I look for Nogar

17. Before I go to sleep at night:
Noga: I snuggle
Ryan: I look for Nogar

18. Right now I am thinking about:
Noga: The weather
Ryan: Organizing

19. I really want:
Noga: To feel secure
Ryan: Things to fall into place

20. Today:
Noga: Is the last day of the summer vacation, and Ryan will be busy. I'm planning on being supportive.
Ryan: I want to get a lot done

21. Tomorrow:
Noga: The first day of school, and I'm teaching my first class for the semester!
Ryan: The first day of school, and I want to be ready.

Frigidaire

2007-08-21T13:31:00.001-05:00

I just discovered that the fridge in my department is an actual Frigidaire. And it looks old too. (For those of you who are not Israeli, we still refer to a refrigerator in Hebrew as "Frigidaire", though I bet that now, and for the past 20 years, you couldn't find an actual Frigidaire refrigerator anywhere in Israel.)

Iowa State Fair 2007

2007-08-19T19:44:00.001-05:00

EVERYBODY said that I have to go to the State Fair, so I took Yossi and we spent a day at the fair.

This is us, at a rare shady spot. You can't tell from the photo, but we were miserably hot and sweaty.

We were the only ones walking around with the fairgrounds map. We had a great time pretending to be Debbie and Gabbie.

This looks like a guy riding a bike on a tightrope, but it isn't. We waited for a while and suffered through all the inferior acts only to see this guy ride the bike, but he sat on it for a second, went back down, and said that the rain had messed up his bike or something. Yossi and I were halfway over to punch him, but were so heat-exhausted that we never made it through.

In case you ever wondered what a pickle dawg is. We didn't dare trying it - the combination of the pickle with the cream cheese sounded like a bit much.

Me. I'm the chicken.

Pigs. The one on the left is pushing its snout into the mud, just like a pig. These pigs won prizes for pig-related things.

The funniest thing was to look at the people who have been living in the cattle barn with their livestock throughout the fair. They have created little homes for themselves and seemed very happy to live in there and care for their animals.

The things I really wanted to see were the mullet competition (which I missed because of the rain) and the demonstration of chicken washing and blow-drying (!!!), which was put in the program for today by mistake and actually took place yesterday. I just can't imagine giving a blow-dry to a chicken.
Maybe next year.

Why am I a terrible NYC tourist:

2007-08-18T11:34:00.000-05:00

I naturally gravitate toward eat/drink places that I know and miss, and am suspicious of new places that may end up being a disappointment. I never had this experience in Tel-Aviv, since Tel-Aviv changes so rapidly.
I can't stand standing in line, especially when I feel that the line could have been avoided (why stand in line for a bar, a restaurant or a club? I will never understand)
I always know best
Everybody's apartments feel small and cramped

Feel free to add more.

Post-NYC

2007-08-17T19:03:00.000-05:00

The New York City visit was a lot of fun. I didn't get to see some people who I wanted to see, but I did get to see others, and Jen and Ryan were the perfect travelmates. My picture page has NYC pics and pics from the BBQ (© traveling dinner party inc.) at Ryan's back yard on the night before our departure.

Arava, Jen and Ryan on the subway:

We had an unusual luck with Shakespeare in the Park. We overslept and only got to Astor Place at 1:30 PM on the day of the show (the ticket booth opens at 1; people stand in line since 8 AM). The line was completely gone, so we were naturally sure that all the tickets were already distributed, but since we were there, we went in to ask. Not only they had extra tickets, but they even had 6 consecutive tickets for us!

The show was great. I've always liked Midsummer Night's Dream, and the production in the park was really enjoyable.

Iowa City is buggy and wet. Ryan went to visit his grandparents for the weekend, which works well for me since I just got the data files for a big freelance job I'm doing for the NYC BOE. We're really happy together (me and Ryan, not me and the data files). I'm going to miss him this weekend, even though we just spent every day of the last 3 months together.

Taking off

2007-08-10T08:43:00.000-05:00

We're leaving the house soon for the airport. I'm excited about visiting NYC, and especially excited about Ryan meeting my good New York friends. Why am I looking forward so much to him meeting them? Maybe I think that he will know me better if he met my friends. Or do I think that it will make me seem better in his eyes? Or am I actually looking forward for them to meet him, and not the other way around?

We'll be back on Wednesday the 15th.

My petting zoo

2007-08-05T12:46:00.000-05:00

I almost forgot: We saw an opossum in our back yard on Friday night.
So far, my back yard count includes:
a raccoon
a rabbit
chipmunks
squirrels
an opossum

Ha.

Management plan

2007-08-04T16:44:00.000-05:00

"...Ms. Admon has agreed to remove herself from participating in any and all decisions that may reward or penalize Mr. O'Connor. Both Ms. Admon and Mr. O'Connor agree to adhere to the above outlined understandings as a "management plan" regarding their relationship.
Mr. O'Connor, however, was assigned a graduate assistantship in the EPLS computer research lab for the 2007-08 academic year. Ms. Admon has assigned duties as supervisor of the graduate assistants in the lab. Thus, a potential conflict of positions was eminent with the coming of the next school year.
It has been determined that Mr. O'Connor will be removed as a graduate assistant in the lab and reassigned by the DEO to a nonconflicting assistantship. (...)"

(from the document "Part II Chapter 5 - Consensual relationships involving students - operations manual", written by the chair of our department, addressed to the Dean)

Sofa season

2007-08-02T22:25:00.000-05:00

I've added a link to Alan's photo page. Look under "Iris's 1st Bday" and "pre '97 IMS 10yr Reunion" for pictures of Ryan and me.

Alan is a friend of ours and a relative of Seth's. He's also the only one around with a nice SLR camera (Keren, you are so far away...), and he brings it with him when he comes over.

A picture he took of us, a month ago (before I decided that I can cut my own hair):

Other news: Iowa City is very much in motion this time of year - the rental cycle corresponds with the academic calendar, so almost all of the rented properties in town change hands during the first week of August. The streets are full of discarded furniture, pick-up trucks with furniture, college kids carrying furniture - sofas seem to sprout everywhere.

If sofas were a flower, I would say that it's sofa season.

Family

2007-08-01T15:07:00.001-05:00

I've been spending a lot of time thinking about family, especially my family, especially the fact that they are in Israel and I am here. I think that I miss my family more and more as I mature, and I find myself saddened over the infrequency of our meetings and the fact that by moving to the US I have, in essence, given up on a close relationship with my family. Not that we're not close; but a feeling of closeness cannot make up for the fact that if I start a family here, my parents and siblings will not be able to be a part of that experience, no matter how close we feel to each other.

During my last visit, my parents suggested that I started taking advantage of the ultra-convenient academic calendar, and came to visit for the entire summer each year. The caveat, of course, is that Israel in the summer months is an impossibly humid sauna-like hell, and so far I have been doing my best to avoid going to Israel during the summertime. That still leaves me with May and June though, and I think I might try to do it this year. Ryan, of course, will have to come with.

In the meantime, my mom and brother will be here next month for a week or so. I'm looking forward to it.

Weekend

2007-07-30T10:24:00.000-05:00

My New York trip is starting to take shape. Ryan and Jen are joining me from the Iowa side, and (hopefully) Becky will be joining me on the New England side. I was even trying to talk Roni into joining from Israel, but no luck there. August 10th through the 15th - which means that we're leaving next week!

The weekend was leisurely. We took a long motorcycle ride (matching helmets and all) around the Mennonite/Amish area south of the city, saw a lot of farm animals and some real Amish people, and visited friends who live in the area. I'm not used to living so close to places where people have very strong religious convictions, and I have never met Mennonites before moving here. I wonder how they get along with my Jewishness.

We've been cooking a lot lately. Ryan likes it, since he sees it as a sign for the existence of an inner domestic self in me, and because I love everything he makes. I like it because he seems to not care that half of what I make ends up being somewhat unusual (my frittata resembled Hanukkah potato patties more than it did a Spanish omelet). I've also been cooking happily for my traveling dinner party. Maybe I am domesticating.

BTW, when did the NY Times online begin with the secret reference feature? I love it.

Shueyville II

2007-07-27T10:27:00.000-05:00

Dean's birthday party up in Shueyville gave me the perfect opportunity to finally take pictures of the house (same house from this post).

These are all things that Dean designed and built himself.

The rest of the house photos, as well as people photos, are here.

Sivan

2007-07-24T11:24:00.000-05:00

My New York friend Sivan was here over the weekend (finally, people are starting to visit me here!). She arrived straight into an all-day all-girl affair in my back yard, which I loved since the group ended up spending hours in hard-core girltalk. I absolutely LOVE all-girl affairs.
Saturday started at Lou Henry, then Atlas and The Mill for drinks, but we spent most of the day at the pond with Ryan, Dean and Iris, and I was glad to be able to provide Sivan with a very un-New-York-like experience. It was a beautiful day, and the only difficulty was fighting the mosquitoes (I had so much DEET on me that I wonder how I didn't pass out).
I wanted to take Sivan to a good local restaurant and was contemplating Motley Cow, 126 and Devotay. We went to the latter, and though the food was delicious, I was somewhat disappointed to discover that the batatas bravas sauce was the same one used for the meatballs. I'm going to take a break from Devotay for a while.
Sivan's last night in town ended with a visit to Verde to hang out with a few friends. I then had a friends-full Sunday, and am still half-recovering from the busy weekend.

The current update on the code-of-ethics predicament is that the chair of our department will, most likely, create a new assistantship for Ryan, and that way Ryan will not lose his assistantship funds, and I will not lose my lab supervisory appointment. It's not ideal, but it's a solution. Ouch. I feel guilty.

Iowa City is gorgeous and fun. The weather has been pleasant bordering perfect, sunny and around 80 degrees, and my biggest problem in life right now is having to apply mosquito repellent when sitting in my back yard at night.

One more happy update - Jen joined my pool team! I'm so happy. My team has been disintegrating lately, and her presence will help solidify a new lineup for the Fall season.

And - happy birthday to whomever has a birthday today!

Code of ethics

2007-07-19T14:36:00.000-05:00

From the University of Iowa code of ethics, section 5.4:

Examples of prohibited and discouraged relationships between faculty and students:5.4 (2) Professor A and student B, a graduate student in Professor A's department, are involved in a romantic relationship. This policy prohibits Professor A from teaching and supervising student B, and mandates disclosure and management of any potential conflict of interest.

There's a conflict, since Ryan is one of my lab assistants. It's now up to our dept. chair to decide how to proceed. I (finally) told him about us yesterday. We'll meet again next week to discuss the potential conflict of interest.

Hmm.

On socialism and the American drinking culture

2007-07-18T15:16:00.000-05:00

There's one more odd Iowa (/Midwest) habit that I haven't had the chance to write about until now: separate checks in restaurants. I have asked for separate checks while dining with colleagues in academic conferences, but until moving here, I have never seen anyone ask for separate checks at the end of a friendly dinner.
The first time it happened (about 3 months ago) I was surprised and almost offended. I then inquired with my friends and was amused to discover that it's a very common practice over here. I've heard various opinions trying to explain the logic behind it, and the one that makes the most sense so far suggests that waitresses in a place like NYC are just too busy and have too much to do than to print a separate check for each diner at the end of a meal. Another opinion suggests that people around here generally have less money than most New Yorkers, so they care more about paying for their exact share at the end of the meal.
Whatever the reason is, this is a practice that I have never experienced anywhere else (not in NYC nor in Tel Aviv), and it took me some time to get used to it. So I have been discussing my resentment toward the separate checks oddity with friends, in an honest attempt to understand its source. Things became very clear to me during lunch today, as Scooter and I were discussing the topic (Scooter is originally from Boston, where people don't ask for separate checks).
My argument focused on the feeling of a shared experience that people feel when splitting (and not separating) the check at the end of the meal. Instead of the petty how-much-was-your-salad how-much-was-his-drink, we agree that we each contribute an equal amount of money, which demonstrates comradery, friendship and the recognition of a joint experience.
An even better situation is when my friends and I take turns in paying for dinner. This practice extends beyond comradery to incorporate the promise of a future event in which the other person will pick up the check, bonding us in a relationship. It is also a relationship in which finances are almost "shared" - it holds an unspoken promise of financial reciprocity which borders on sharing; it gives off a feeling of sharing, though there's no real sharing. Evidently, the only ones in my life with whom I have this kind of financial relationship are my closest friends and family.
This, finally, brings me to the topic of drinking culture: more accurately, the finances of the American drinking culture. I really like the "buy a round" system - whoever happens to walk to the bar next gets a round for everybody at the table. This, in my mind, is the polar opposite of the separate checks system. It makes perfect financial sense, and it makes you constantly feel either generous (if you just bought a round and everybody's thanking you) or grateful (if someone just bought you a drink), both of which are good, heart-warming, friendly feelings. On top of that - and here's where socialism comes in - my NYC friends and I used to always try to help a little if someone was having a financial downtime. We would make sure that s/he didn't get a chance to get the next round, and just take care of his/her drinks for a while, until things stabilized financially for that person. As I was talking to Scooter today, it just hit me - this is it, this is modern-day socialism! It's no secret that I'm a closeted socialist, which explains why I like the finances of the American drinking culture. And by the same logic, separate checks are the perfect outcome of an overly-calculating capitalistic society.
I'll drink to that!

Tornado, university style

2007-07-16T16:30:00.000-05:00

This is my punishment for finally sticking to a work-related resolution. I have been feeling so bad about being such a slacker at work, and have resolved to dedicate this week to my papers and research. It's 4:33 and I'm in the basement of my building together with everybody else, hiding from the tornado. Lucky for us, the basement happens to have a computer lab, so we each grabbed a computer and are following the radar maps (while others are shamelessly blogging). On a second thought, this is better than sitting in my own basement at home, with no computer and no people (though my landlord did figure out the light switch for the basement, which for some reason is in Jen's staircase).

It looks like this. On the front page of weather.com there's a note: A tornado has been sighted or indicated by radar in your area - seek shelter immediately!
Leading to a page with detailed information. This time it's much scarier than last time. It states: THE TORNADO WILL BE NEAR... CORALVILLE AND OAKDALE AROUND 425 PM CDT... UNIVERSITY HEIGHTS AROUND 435 PM CDT... IOWA CITY AROUND 440 PM CDT... HILLS AROUND 445 PM CDT...

(click on the picture for a clearer image)

So yes, here I am. At the computer lab in the basement. I did get some work done today, so at least I'm hiding from a tornado with a little less guilt than before.

Literary journeys

2007-07-13T15:17:00.000-05:00

Not much to update from this week. We bought matching (!) motorcycle helmets, but I'm waiting for convincing us-in-helmets pictures to put up, and we don't have any yet. I do feel much better about spending so much time on the back of his motorcycle now that I have a helmet. We have also started reading Ulysses, which is a project we have been discussing for some time. We read it together, out loud, and constantly refer to the annotations book, since there are so many literary and cultural references and we want to understand them all. It takes a while, and we realize it may take a very long time to finish the book, which doesn't dissuade us any, at least not so far. Ryan used to teach literature, and I'm counting on his teacher skills to help us on our journey. He has also been teaching me how to read Hemingway's short stories. Oh, and he made me read The Odyssey before starting Ulysses, so in the last few weeks I have been living in the world of greek gods and their whims.

I've added a link to Adina's (new and improved) photo page. It features photos from the last few months, including photos from last night's memorable dance party at the Picador. Which reminds me - I'm afraid that this blog will end up being a celebration of fun and frivolity, so I intend on starting to write some more depressing reflections.
Soon.

"my dreams will be sure to seek you"

Backyard action

2007-07-09T09:22:00.000-05:00

I have finally declared my back yard ready for action, and consequentially have invited my traveling dinner companions to join me outside. It was hot (95 degrees) and humid, though most of us braved the weather successfully (Aba!).

Interestingly, the food level keeps rising each time we all meet. I wonder what will happen if we keep at it. This time I even made quiche (most likely for the first time in my life). It took me three hours and made me very proud of myself.

The last guests left around midnight, thanks to Adina's mojitos and some ultra-comfortable patio chairs. Thank you all for coming and cooking. Some hilarious photos are to be found here.

Birthday

2007-07-06T08:59:00.000-05:00

We spent the first half of the week at Ryan's parents' house, celebrating his birthday with his family and Dean, who took the motorcycle and showed up for a short while (in the picture: watching Ryan contemplate his birthday cake).
It all went well, especially spending an afternoon with Ryan's nieces. Last time I saw them I was having fun with the older niece, who's 5, but the 2-year-old was shy. This time they both were happy and playful with me, not to mention affectionate. There is a certain irresistible feeling when a child accepts you and becomes affectionate toward you.

We got back to IC in time for the fireworks, and sat on the grass on Dubuque street with the rest of town. It's a pretty moving sight, seeing the entire town gravitate toward one spot.

What else? We've been spending time on Ryan's house lately - reorganizing his closet, emptying and cleaning the fridge, stuff like that. I guess I'm at the weird stage of the relationship of being full of energy for doing these kinds of things. We have thrown out a garbage bag full of expired foods from the fridge, and donated two huge garbage bags full of his clothes to Goodwill. I've always loved throwing things away - in fact, it's one of my favorite things to do - while Ryan, like most humanity, is the opposite. I think I should start renting out my services as closet organizer - since I have no proclivity for keeping anything, I can really get the job done. Especially with people who are having a hard time throwing things away.

Oh, and did I mention the grass in my back yard? There's grass in my back yard. I made something grow! I haven't made anything grow since that bean-in-a-cup in 2nd grade. The grass is very green and thin and fragile, which makes it all the more endearing. Now Jen and I just have to get our hands on a decent pair of speakers so we can hook up our iPods out there. I've already invited friends for Sunday - now that I have both patio furniture and grass, I can have real people over!

"she sometimes stands sweetly before me"

Chicago III

2007-07-01T18:43:00.000-05:00

Ryan's birthday is tomorrow, and we're leaving for his parents' place in an hour. His dad is in California for business, so we're just going to spend a couple of days with his mom and siblings.

We are deliriously happy together. It's almost embarrassing.

"and I learned this with a certain expectation..."

First timers

2007-06-30T02:19:00.000-05:00

Things I did for the first time in the past week:

- swim in a pond
- shoot a potato gun
- kill an iPod (and buy a new one)
- buy Ryan a birthday present
- eat a brat

All ended up being very enjoyable experiences. Even the iPod disaster was good, as I'm completely in love with my new iPod (though Stephen has one-upped me with already getting the new and exciting iPhone).

"like caveman in wilderness"

Tuesday

2007-06-27T07:15:00.000-05:00

I had a good Tuesday.

Yard:
The morning was dedicated to working in the back yard with Jen. Now that we have patio furniture, we feel highly motivated to improve the general look of things. Ryan helped us get rid of all the stray weeds and sow grass, and now we can't wait for it to grow.

Pool:
I won all my games. Having lost last week, I really needed some ego boost, and I got it last night. I'm also enjoying Bruce's company a lot. Bruce is my team captain and one of the best players (and nicest people) I've ever known. He's in his fifties, and is undergoing chemotherapy treatments for his recurring throat cancer. He also has to use a voicebox in order to speak. I no longer smoke during pool.

Raccoons:
I had to break my car in the middle of Lucas street on my way home from pool, as a raccoon family was crossing the street. It was dark and I only saw them in the last minute, and barely managed to stop in time. Mother raccoon saw me coming and realized right away that they should retreat, but her pups didn't know what to do and started wondering everywhere - some running toward the middle of the road, some sticking close to her and refusing to move. She eventually gathered them and they all raccoonned their way to the safety of the sidewalk.
I have only seen one raccoon before last night - in my driveway, at midnight, in February. And I've heard really bad stories about raccoons. I can't help it though - I still get so excited by the wildlife in my own town.

Ryan:
Irresistible.
"I saw us together with happiness wherever we wanted to be"

Around Iowa

2007-06-26T10:46:00.000-05:00

The weekend has come and gone in a flash. I barely blinked, and it's already Monday.
Here is the map.
Jen and I spent Friday at Jocelyn's house, celebrating her birthday. The weather was wild - Jocelyn lives in the middle of nowhere, and lightning was hitting all around us as we were driving in the storm. I tried to catch a lightning with my cellphone camera, but ended up with the sky alone:

And this was at 6 PM, which is usually still a time of bright daylight!

Saturday was hectic - Jen and I woke up and went out to buy patio furniture for our soon-to-be-awesome back yard, but it was taking us too long. We visited every thrift store in the area, and eventually found our dream furniture up in Coralville. Patio furniture doesn't last in thrift stores this time of year, and we were lucky to be there right as somebody was hauling in the set that we ended up buying. It took us two minutes to realize that the tabletop cannot possibly fit in Jen's car, and then spent a while waiting for Ryan to come and rescue us with his bigass Honda. By the time we unloaded his car and got back to town, it was already after 5, and by the time Ryan was ready, we had to leave for Russ's birthday party up in Shueyville. I missed two other parties that I planned on attending that afternoon, though I can always blame the patio furniture. (We are really excited about it. Can't wait to start throwing parties in our back yard. The deck and yard just look so much better now! And I even got our landlords to bug-spray the grass!)

Russ's parents' home is at the edge of Shueyville. We saw about 30 deer on our way to their house - just leisurely crossing the road, or standing right by the shoulder and looking at us in boredom. The house itself is one of the most unusual places I have ever visited - they just finished redoing it all in natural wood. It's a log house, and most of the shelves and rails inside are made of natural wood from local fallen trees. I wish I had my camera with me.

Russ's parents kept mixing shots and grilling meat for us, and there were card games and even fireworks (one of the few American customs I still find very bizarre). We all had a lot to drink and most of us ended up spending the night, so we only drove back to Iowa City on Sunday afternoon. Took a few hours apart, met again for dinner, and tonight Ryan is going to (hopefully) make a guest appearance at the weekly dinner party with my friends.

How I manage to do any work with all of this is beyond me.

"look into my eyes...and know"

Big fish

2007-06-21T22:49:00.000-05:00

Once a month, a guy shows up in Iowa City and sells fresh fish and seafood from the back of his truck. He travels all throughout the midwest, and rumor has it that his is the best and freshest fish one can obtain in these parts of the country (i.e., as far from the ocean as possible). He was here on Tuesday, so I went and got some, and an impromptu dinner party formed in Ryan's back yard.

Dean, scaling the fish:

The rest is here.

Visiting his family

2007-06-18T21:39:00.001-05:00

The weekend was great. I met R's parents and his sister and her family. They were the perfect hosts - we did nothing but eat and drink all day, and would have stayed longer had it not been for a meeting in our department tomorrow.

On our way there, we stopped at some country restaurant (Iowa-Seed-Restaurant-something?), where I had a pork pot roast for the first time. It's basically a huge bowl of pork. Outside the restaurant there were tractor rides, as well as the following:

His parents live right by Naperville, a small suburb outside Chicago. R showed me downtown Naperville on Saturday, and on Sunday we celebrated father's day with too many drinks on the patio and later dinner in an unusual Chicago restaurant, right across the street from where the St. Valentine's Day Massacre took place.

We drove back today through some major rainstorms, and since I haven't seen Jen in 10 days, within 10 minutes of my arrival back in town, she and I were out drinking and exchanging stories. The best part of the night was being joined by our landlords Kurt and Tom, who also ended up paying for the night, which we only found out much later.

Landlords:

R and I are both are a little incredulous over how well this is going. He even braved my Israeli music without complaints. We'll try to spend some time apart in the next couple of days, though I'm not sure whether we'll be able to.

"eyes all about, direct"

Chicago II

2007-06-15T11:58:00.001-05:00

We're going to Chicago for father's day weekend, to hang out with his parents and siblings. Leaving later in the afternoon, back on Monday. I have grand plans of making him listen to my Israeli music on the way, and of not doing anything stupid in the next 4 days.

We'll see.

"...I woke up suddendly, imagining that you were here"

Traveling dinner party

2007-06-12T13:42:00.000-05:00

My friends and I have accidentally started a weekly traveling dinner party tradition. The party moves between houses, everybody brings something to eat and drink, and we all get together. This week (meeting #4, I believe) we had a couple of absentees - Brooke is still in California and Rich is in some other country - so we added a couple of new people.
It's a fun tradition, and so far I've been enjoying it a lot.

To see me balance a glass of wine on my tongue, go here.

Picnic, Iowa style

2007-06-11T15:50:00.000-05:00

We took the bike to Sugar Bottom, where a friend of R's recommended a spot in the woods where one could spread a blanket and picnic. It took us a while to find, as the super-secret picnic spot is a small clearing in the middle of the woods, under a group of pine trees. Very different from central park, as well as from any picnic spot I've ever encountered in Israel.

I heard cicadas for the first time in my life (and had one on my chest for several long seconds until I talked it into moving on). They make a deafening noise, though we got used to it fairly quickly. I also picnicked with R for the first time in my life, and it was absolutely gorgeous and wonderful. We were isolated from anything and anyone, it was a beautiful day, and the scenery around the clearing was completely wild. The only living creature (other than the occasional ant or spider) we encountered was a young doe, who stood no more than 30 feet away and just started at us. Pretty fantastic.

"...let me count the ways"

Tornado (not)

2007-06-08T14:44:00.001-05:00

I had my first almost-tornado experience yesterday. The weather alerts were getting worse and worse, so I left the office and drove home around 2 PM.

(edited) gchat with R, yesterday, 2:49 PM:
me: is that a tornado siren?
R: yes, it is
me: do i run into the basement?
R: fuck yeah
me: shit
R: relax and go...take phone and ill call you
me: i'm freaking out

Had to run down to the basement twice yesterday. Grabbed a book, a flashlight, my phone and my camera:

The tornado passed us from the north. These things are, apparently, plenty dangerous, move extremely fast, and have wiped out a few houses in my neighborhood last year. (Don't worry mom - I have a basement.) I find it all very exciting.

Wednesday

2007-06-06T11:17:00.001-05:00

It's Wednesday already. We both keep losing track of time, mixing up the days, going to bed in the middle of the night after talking for hours. I'm glad I don't have anything hanging over my head this week at the university.
Jen is leaving tomorrow for a week, and we hardly got to spend any time together in the past 3 days. I have to fix that.

I feel good. It feels good. He's unusual and crazy, and he lives in a world of literature and writing which I find fascinating. I have no idea what he sees in me.

"...as he whispered my name in the dewy grass..."

Living in a small town

2007-06-03T15:41:00.000-05:00

We spent Friday at the mennonite fair, where you could see things like this...

...and even find a tractor for me to play with.

The mennonites make apple butter. It tastes and looks like the sweet appley liquid in between the apple pieces inside an apple pie. I was wondering out loud whether they take apple pies and squeeze them into jars to create apple butter.

I also learned that Iowa City is very small. The day ended at the town's artsfest:

where I realized that in spite (or because?) of the mass of people, you keep running into people you know.

It's a small town, and just like Tel Aviv, you'll find that you're only removed by one person from most people around. So on the one hand it's easy to make new friends and everybody feels a sense of closeness, but on the other hand, it also tends to be gossipy and semi-incestuous. This could be somewhat of a problem for me and my new guy, as the gossip has already started, but we don't really care.

"I read when I wasn't with you and I kissed you when I was"

Confusion

2007-05-31T21:50:00.000-05:00

The "dork test" was a huge hit. Every person I know took it. They're all nerds. So am I.

I'm having a very odd week, all because of this guy. My emotions are all over the place. He needs to figure out a few things with himself before we move on.
What ended up happening was that neither of us managed to successfully focus at work, and the week flew by on the wings of emotional confusion. I vacillate from sad to happy once an hour (usually - sad when he's gone, happy when he's around).

I hope it works out.

"He laughed like a madman with thick drops of rain, coldly slamming into his face as he drove home, wishing he could just disappear"

Dorks

2007-05-28T09:21:00.000-05:00

A few people have asked me to explain the difference between nerds, dorks and geeks (after I classified a few guys I dated as "dorks"). Eventually, Naomi took matters into her hands and found this. Guaranteed to resolve the mystery. Thanks Naomi.

(I scored 52 % Nerd, 34% Geek, 17% Dork)

More from NYC

2007-05-27T13:07:00.000-05:00

Outside a coffee shop, east village:

Park fence, east village:

Parking rates:

Israel photos

2007-05-26T13:11:00.000-05:00

Are here!

NYC pics

2007-05-25T13:07:00.000-05:00

While I'm waiting for Becky with the Israel photos, here are some graduation photos and some NYC photos. Enjoy!

Back

2007-05-22T14:25:00.000-05:00

I thought that by this point I'll have photos online and everything, but there's a slight delay. I just got back on Saturday night, straight into a dreadful case of food poisoning that left me bedridden up until this very morning. Food poisoning really, really sucks. It's so bad. And since it happened from a sandwich I made in my kitchen, I'm still a little freaked out about touching anything in there.
NYC and Israel were great. Graduation was great. I have a million stories, so naturally I end up writing nothing. It was good to see all the friends, and thank you everybody who let me sleep on their couches.
I'll post the photos in a few days.

Man, food poisoning sucks.

Graduation!

2007-05-12T15:22:00.000-05:00

On missing

2007-05-04T06:17:00.000-05:00

I miss places more than I miss people.

I remember the sudden feeling of emptiness and displacement that attacked me a few days after moving to IC and lasted for about a day. It was the feeling of missing NYC - not a specific person or a specific neighborhood, but NYC as a whole, as an entity that never took a concrete shape in my mind until I left.
The last four months have been the longest time I have spent outside of NYC since 1999. I woke up 2 minutes ago feeling excited and anticipatory.
I've also noticed that I'm still referring in casual conversation to NYC as "home", even though between Israel, New York and Iowa, New York is the one that least qualifies as "home".
It's been years now since I've fully realized that what I miss most about Israel is Tel-Aviv as a city/entity. I now have the same feeling toward NYC. Isn't it funny, how connected we feel to these large, anonymous cities?

I have to admit that I am extremely happy in IC. This place is magical. I really like my house, my neighbors, my landlords, my friends, my street, my local bar, my students and my colleagues. I feel very much like myself and very much at home here. I'm curious to know what I am going to feel as I get off the subway and drag my suitcase up 8th ave.

No words

2007-05-03T12:37:00.000-05:00

It's all about the adjectives

2007-05-02T14:55:00.000-05:00

In the past week, I've been called:

- An engaging person
- A kickass person
- A liar
- A person who never lies
- Pretty damn cool
- An apologist for assholes

Makes one wonder.

Spring

2007-04-30T10:20:00.000-05:00

I saw a chipmunk in my back yard today. For those of you who may be unaware of it, chipmunks are the cutest animals, and they certainly outcute squirrels by far.
The bugs I find in my house are very different from what you find in New York or in Tel Aviv. No roaches, just all sorts of smallish beetles and spiders. They're much easier to deal with. I also discovered that dead ladybugs are hard to clean - I was cleaning the windowsills in my kitchen (as I just opened the windows for the first time), which meant discarding of dead flies and ladybugs. Dead flies: Easy to clean. Dead ladybugs: Very slippery. Not easy at all.
Lastly in the spring theme, there are wild mushrooms in the grass in front of the engineering building, which I cross every day on my way to my office. They have just sprouted a few days ago, after the first major spring rain. Between the mushrooms and the ladybugs and chipmunks, this place is a little fairy-tale-ish for a city girl like myself.

Birthday party!

2007-04-28T12:27:00.000-05:00

Last night Anna and I held a mutual birthday party. The pictures are here. I vowed to make goofy faces in every single photo, but to my great dismay discovered this morning that my goofy faces amount to, basically, one face. And it's not even that goofy. I'm going to work on my repertoire of goofy faces and do better next time.

A few favorites:

Claudia, her cleavage, me, and an ice cube. Can you find the ice cube in the picture, kids?

Adina and me, in one of about 7 or 8 attempts to capture on film the fact that both her top and my skirt were ruffled. At 1 AM it looked like a really hilarious coincidence. Notice the angle of the beer in my glass - yet not a drop was spilt!

Teaching an apprehensive Anna how to take a shot.

Now I have to wait for an entire week until my next birthday celebration!

Evaluation

2007-04-26T00:54:00.000-05:00

My teaching evaluation was successful. The chair and I finally had a chance to chat today, and he seemed pleased with what he saw. The one critique he had was about my syllabus not including enough information about the class assignments, but apparently he was supposed to tell me to do that before I started teaching and he didn't, so we agreed on eliminating that from the report he's sending to the dean altogether. I feel sneaky.

He also reiterated, yet again, that if I wanted to stay, I can stay on tenure track after the initial 3 years are over. They already know that they will have room in the budget, and it is completely up to me then. We agreed, as always, to talk about this again in a year or so, as it's too early for me to make up my mind either way.

I'm extremely busy at work right now, and will be until I leave next week. I'm trying desperately to finish revisions on a paper and send it out before I leave. I will also have to bring my student papers with me to NYC and grade them there, sadly, in order to submit the grades on time.

8 more days!

News

2007-04-21T16:02:00.000-05:00

I had to drive to Des Moines on Friday to get my fingerprints done at the INS center. The drive takes about 2 hours in each direction. Getting my fingerprints took about 3 minutes. Oh well. The good news is that this is the last step before the big GC arrives in the mail. I can't wait!

I've been sick for a few days, so now I'm in the post-flu stage of feeling okay, with a bad sinus-headache whenever I bend forward. But I'll be back at the office tomorrow. (It's all good - I've already watched all my tivoed films anyhow.)

What else? Oh, there's no vegetable lasagna frozen dinner at the grocery store here. I'm not sure why. It's the only kind of frozen dinner I ever eat, so I end up with no frozen dinners at all. I did stock up on brussel sprouts though, which apparently I can munch on endlessly. Oddly enough, I'm getting more creative with my cooking and have been cooking a lot for myself lately. It's not very sophisticated, but it counts. (maybe it's not that odd, considering the absence of vegetable lasagnas.)

Lastly - my accent modification lessons are going very, very well. My teacher is great - we've already made it to multi-syllable words (I know it sounds dumb. Bite me). The list of words I have been mispronouncing for years is getting longer and longer. I'm so excited about finally saying things correctly. Who knew that most American English vouls should be pronounced as a limp "eh"?

Jen

2007-04-19T22:19:00.000-05:00

My friend Jen has the best job title ever:

And her camera beats mine.

Banks

2007-04-17T10:03:00.000-05:00

I had to open a local bank account, so I looked around a little for local banks. That was back in January when Becky was here.
I guess I never thought that the combination of living in the WEST and looking for a BANK will generate banks called -

The West Bank

and Bank of the West

And that is why I have an account with Hills Bank. I just don't think I could say something like "I'm going to the west bank later today" without giggling.

Childish Israelis. Yep.

My DNA (cheesy web version)

2007-04-16T15:25:00.000-05:00

I'm a

Benevolent Leader

More here. As always, I scored 4/100 on femininity, and 98/100 on the "earthy/imaginative" scale.
Oh well.

Goodbye

2007-04-13T09:18:00.000-05:00

Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt

"They were innocent great apes, with limited means for doing mischief, which, in my opinion as an old, old man, is all that human beings were ever meant to be." (Slapstick)

The Sound of Music

2007-04-09T21:08:00.000-05:00

Just watched most of "The Sound of Music" for the first time in (many, many) years, and found myself tearing up badly. Oh. I guess one never knows oneself until one watches The Sound of Music.

Roni

2007-04-09T12:39:00.000-05:00

Roni, I love you! Miss you so much little sis.

Easter

2007-04-08T17:56:00.000-05:00

My first Easter took place at Aba's. I learned how to dye eggs.

This is what dying eggs looks like

My first egg. I followed the cubist approach of triple coloring and delicate strokes to symbolize the urgency of the human condition.

Jen and eggs

Apparently, you're supposed to EAT the eggs. Not having anything else to eat in Aba's house other than steak helps, too. I was so hungry that I could eat an egg.

Don't ask me about the bunny. I know nothing about it.

2007-04-04T08:09:00.000-05:00

If I'm so happy to see him go, then why am I so sad?

Seder 2007

2007-04-01T12:35:00.000-05:00

We read, we sang, we ate, we drank. It was a good seder all around (including 3 virgins! I'm so proud to have been somebody's first Seder).

The table

Scooter and Maggie, in fashionable black

Jennie, singing. I was so happy to find - for the first time - an American who knows the Hebrew songs.

Aba and Violet, trying to get over the excessive mentioning of god throughout the night. ("Aren't you supposed to be an atheist anyway?")

Jen and Amy. Amy is rapping the table with her hand to the rhythm of the song while making an expression that communicates something like "I have no idea what's going on, but I'll play along".

Dana and Anna, highly troubled by god's word

Me, MCing

Thank you everybody for making food and helping out.

Tomorrow JC is moving out. And so it goes. I guess it fits with the theme of Seder.

Accent

2007-03-30T10:25:00.000-06:00

A week ago I happened to run into this girl who works as a speech therapist. As we were chit-chatting, I discovered that accent modification was her favorite topic when she was studying speech therapy, and what do you know - she volunteered to give me accent modification lessons for free!
I had my first lesson yesterday. Apparently -
1) I barely pronounce anything correctly.
2) Pronouncing things correctly is HARD.
3) English speakers move their lips less than Hebrew speakers. I'm practicing minimal lip movement.

My homework includes a long list of "i" words (kill, dig, big, rich, and about 50 others). We'll see what happens.

Tomorrow's my seder. Lots of work. Wait for the pics on Sunday!

Fw: Ode to Bacon

2007-03-23T10:18:00.001-06:00

So a few weeks ago, I turned down a 2 AM invitation for bacon (there was a snow storm and it was 2 AM), arguing that Tivo surpasses bacon as a focal point of ultimate satisfaction. Today, I wake up to find the following dialogue in my inbox.

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Maria Alvarez
Date: Mar 23, 2007 1:47 AM
Subject: Ode to Bacon
To: nogaboga

Ryan, is it true that if a person has Tivo,Tivo surpasses bacon as the focal point of ultimate satisfaction.

No...what the hell is Tivo?

Something on the TV...

Do you eat it off of the TV?

I'm not sure, but I think it is a source of instant gratification.

Does it cook bacon? Because bacon satisfies - but you have to slow cook it. Bacon is the world. Bacon is life. Bacon is the ultimate focal point of satisfaction.

Who would eat Tivo if they have bacon?

No one I know, it was just a random thought...should we call J.C. and Noga over for some bacon and a bottle of Makers Mark?

No, pigs don't live north of Kentucky, and I doubt Israel has pigfarms. Who drinks Makers Mark outside of Kentucky?

How do you know Israel doesn't have pigs on the kibbutz communities? Besides, we're north of Kentucky. I have been known to drink Makersand I have never even been to Kentucky, well, if you don't count thatyear I threw up mint julips on the owners of that horse called Sea Biscuit.

Are you sure Kentucky is north?

Well, yes, north and a little west. Israel is across the big pond.

When did you work on a kibbutz?

I didn't. Did I say I did?

What time is it?

It's Friday right about now. They may be playing pool...I'll call them.

Tell them Bacon is the world. Bacon is life. Bacon is the ultimatefocal point of satisfaction. Tivo is a false imitation. Like soy bacon.

Really...besides, Tivo sounds like a communist leader.

Do we have enough for the cab?

Why? can't you drive?

I didn't drive...we're in your car...and I couldn't drive even if I were in my car. Besides I can't read the numbers on my cell phone tocall the cab or Noga or J.C.

That settles it. I can't drive, but I will...and I will cook the bacon.

Taste this, what could be better? Who would, or could, possibly disagree that bacon is the world?

No one I know.

Beware of false idols.

Israel visit!

2007-03-22T01:44:00.000-06:00

I found out today why people use oven mitts. I used a towel and set it on fire, and then jumped up and down on it for a while to put out the fire, while half-burning my kitchen floor.

The other exciting piece of news is that I have my final Israel visit dates! May 10th through the 19th, with an embassy appointment on the 14th to renew my visa. The plan right now involves a visit to NYC on the 4th for my birthday, staying for my doctoral graduation ceremony on the 8th, then taking off for Israel on the 10th. Perfect. Can't wait to see everybody.

Spring break

2007-03-16T14:38:00.000-06:00

We picked up Jonathan in Kentucky and drove down to Destin, Florida, where it's nice and warm.

To start with, here's the mandatory eating-ice-cream-at-the-beach photo. What makes kids and ice cream at the beach so irresistible?

Castle-building. Later I taught JC my childhood trick of a "dripping mud castle" (thanks mom), and then had some quiet from him for about an hour.

Our plan to rent a boat and go on an adventure-full fishing escapade was thwarted by the elevated boat rental prices, so we ended up attempting to fish at the pier. Here's JC in a typical fishing pose.

Me, not understanding how come he only caught seaweed and jellyfish.

JC and his brother Scott. Scott took good care of us and guided us through the abundant culinary offerings of Destin.

Lastly, a picture I took at a Cracker Barrel in Alabama. I'm thinking about it. So far my back yard includes (as far as I can tell) one raccoon, one rabbit, and lots of squirrels.

Back on the league

2007-03-07T09:33:00.000-06:00

Yesterday was my first night with the local pool league. I won all my games, which is pretty cool. The handicap system here goes by point average, so winning all my games gives me a perfect average of 40 - which won't last long, but it's fun to start strong. My teammates are laid back and wouldn't have cared either way (I think), even though one of them is a 7 (or an ex-7, as he's no longer an APA player), and he's also the league manager or something like that. We stayed behind and shot some against each other after the night was over, and I even won a few games.

We're leaving tomorrow to take advantage of my spring break and warm up some. Picking up JC's son in Kentucky, spending a day or two with his parents, and heading south to Alabama/Florida, hoping to find a nice beach with cheap boats and good weather. I'll probably bring the laptop with me, so expect updates with photos of us fishing in the sun.

Crab Boil 2007

2007-03-05T09:17:00.000-06:00

Participants: 1 JC, 1 Brooke, 1 Claudia, 1 Maria, 1 Ryan, 1 me, 4 crabs, 1.5 pounds clams, 1 pound shrimp, 1 spice bag, lots of corn and potatoes

So JC wakes up and says "let's have a crab boil". Since I don't know what a crab boil is, I say "sure". He puts on his cooking attire (just like here), and it's on.

Here it is, for those of you unfamiliar with the procedure:

Step 1
Purchase a 12-quart pot, a couple of crab crackers, and the ingredients listed above

Step 2
Invite friends

Step 3
Throw live crabs into boiling water

Step 4
Throw everything from the boiling water onto a dining table that has been pre-covered with newspapers

Step 5
Eat

Step 6
Look bewilderingly at the empty table

Step 7
Lie back and relax

Thanks to all the participants.
Until next time -
(don't bring a sandwich to a restaurant -)
N

Israeli Friends

2007-03-02T19:36:00.000-06:00

What do you know, IC is crawling with Israelis and semi-Israelis. I've made friends with some.

Yossi, Adina, Tali:

Brooke and Tali:

Tomorrow - Tali's birthday and Purim party (that's the Jewish Halloween). JC and I have prepared killer costumes - he's going to be a rabbi and I'm going to be a Catholic nun. He thinks that there's great porn potential right there. We'll see.

Aba's apartment

2007-03-02T13:37:00.000-06:00

One cannot fully appreciate Aba's uniqueness without seeing the inside of his apartment. Here it is, as of 1 AM this morning.

Computer area:

Living room (models - Aba and my student Maria):

I hired him to design my office at the university. Can't wait for the results.